lifeishitsometimes.

Tae say i used to be pretty obsessed with blogging i don't really write anymore do i :|
lol well. college is abs amaze. like really, i've made so many friends.. summit which i have tae say i have struggled with in the past. it's the holidays now. we're off to butlins tomorrow. yesterday was mine and jordans 6th month anniversary. time flies, huh? lulz i was just reading old blogs, ach. ewan's gone back into hospital. i cannae stand it when he's away. i hate having to email martine. it kills me inside. i wish i could be there to hold his hand, but i can't. i need him to get better. i /need/ him tae get the all clear.
why is that so much to ask fer?
he's 38 years old for gods sakee. he's not an old man, not that old men should get ill anyway but you know. he's got a good 40/50 years maybe to live. and make happy memories. and to think all that can just be taken away from him in the click of a finger is so fucking unfair.
he's been so sweet with me lately. ever since he got out of hospital the last time round. i think he's scared, but he won't let on because he doesn't want to upset me. he's such a lovely man and it hurts that he's going through all this shit.
ach. what more can i say? i guess i have to concentrate on jordan but it can be so hard sometimes.
i lay awake alot thinking about ewan wondering what a life with him in would be like.
is that so bad? idkkkk.
tatty-bye x

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bad tae worse.

lol wtf is ach wrong with me. i'm liek. falling for my boyf's mum. how freaking normal is dat?! O.o ..not vair. lol like. i hate how fucked up i am. why can't it just be straight forwards, why can't i just love jordan and feel feck all fer anyone else? ._. lulz i know if he simply even looked at another girl it'd break my heart. yet i'm in love with a 37year old man and nao possibly jordans mum?! life sucks biiiiiig time, sometimes. most of the time. ye.

Idk i'm just sick of this crap, mahn.

xo

i haven't blogged since i was 17 :|

I have missed you blogger.
I cannae put commars in my blogz tonight cuz i'm at G-Forces and he spunked on his keyboard so some of the buttons broke becuz he iz gay. :)
lol likee. Idk why i haven't blogged.
Maybe i'm just gay.
Things are quite good atm.
I started college and made a nice group of friends.
I have an amaze boyfriend.
And stufffffffsssss.
I lav you blogger. You let me read old blogs and i can liek ponder on my previous times.
Hummmmm.